A Week in the Life of a Mom Chef
My love/hate relationship with food and feeding my family
“What’s for dinner tonight, Mom?” I hear this familiar refrain daily, and I’ll admit, it can sometimes feel like an unending challenge that I dread. The responsibility of planning and preparing three meals a day for my three kids is a task that keeps me on my toes as a busy working teacher. It’s a juggling act of grocery lists, shopping excursions, tight schedules, and trying to satisfy everyone’s varied preferences. When I was first pregnant and tried to imagine the upcoming challenges of parenthood, I had no idea that my daily routines and constant thoughts would revolve around food. And the worst part is that I don’t like to cook.
Before children, mealtime was a pleasurable and relaxing break in my day. It was a time to indulge my cravings and satisfy my own needs. I could eat when I wanted to eat and make my own choices around my own preferences and timeline. It was so much simpler and a break away from the stresses of life. My relationship with food immediately changed once I became a mother. My entire mindset had to shift. Constantly planning ahead to figure out the logistics, mealtime became a source of stress and frustration, and my own desires and needs came last. From the first moment my newborn baby cried, demanding to be breastfed on her schedule, I could no longer think about meals in the same way.
Over the last 18 years of being a mom, I’ve adjusted to my role as the provider of food. My husband’s job in advertising has irregular hours, often working late at night, so he is rarely home by dinnertime. As a teacher, my hours at work are consistent, so I am usually always home with the kids for dinner. Although I do not like to cook, as I’ve repeated SEVERAL times, I’ve come to accept that this is my job. The challenges of handling dinner have become more complicated as my children’s schedules have become more demanding. With a fifth grader and two high schoolers, we are busy. I’m a teacher at the high school where my older two daughters, Stella and Evelyn, attend. My youngest daughter, Hazel, is in 5th grade in the same district. After school, they have lessons, classes, jobs, homework, sports, clubs, and teams. Not only do I need to make dinner, I have to figure out when I have time to make the dinner in between driving and picking them up from their activities.
Breakfast and lunch are easy. Since our family rushes to get out the door to get to school and work on time, I make sure that our pantry is always stocked with the kids’ favorite grab-and-go breakfast items. We have breakfast bars, mini croissants, cereal, milk, mini muffins, cheese danish, yogurt, and fruit. For lunch, my kids can choose to make their own lunch or get the school lunch. I keep the kitchen supplied with what they need for lunch and snacks: everything to make sandwiches, hummus and pita, yogurt, chips, fruit, applesauce, crackers, cheese, canned soup. Everyone in our family can choose what they want to eat, and they are responsible for preparing it themselves.
Dinner is a different beast. The weekend beforehand, I have to analyze our crazy schedule for the week. I figure out how much time I can squeeze in to prepare dinner for everyone. Every day is a little different, depending on the after school and evening activities.
What follows is an honest look at my after school schedule, and the unimpressive and real dinners I prepared for my kids this week. My husband was out of town for work, so my week was even more hectic than usual. As a non-cook, I looked for simple recipes or quickly-prepared meals.
Monday:
I’ll leave work and pick up Hazel from school at 3:30. After dropping off Stella and Hazel at home, I will head back to the high school to pick up Evelyn from play practice at 5. We will get back home at 5:20, and I need to leave home at 5:30 to get to my evening class by 6. What do I have time to prepare in 10 minutes?
Preheat the oven. Open a bag of pizza rolls and put them on a cookie sheet.
Text my daughter: Oven is preheating. Can you put the pizza rolls in at 5:40?
Leave for class.
Tuesday:
After school, drop off Stella and Evelyn at music class by 4. Get home with Hazel by 4:30. Make dinner and feed her by 6. Leave home at 6:15 to pick up Stella and Evelyn. Get back home by 6:45 and heat up their dinner.
Mushroom Pepper Melts & Fries
Ingredients:
Potatoes
Shredded Mozzarella
Onion
Green Pepper
Mushrooms
Bread
Mayonnaise
Dijon Mustard
Mushroom Stock
Olive Oil
Seasoning: Garlic Powder, Onion Powder, Paprika, Salt, Pepper
This is a quick and easy meal that doesn’t require a lot of ingredients. If the kids get home after dinner time, the sandwich filling can easily be reheated to assemble the sandwiches for them when they get home.
First, prepare the potatoes by cutting into wedges. On a baking sheet, drizzle with olive oil and sprinkle with salt, pepper, garlic powder, onion powder, and paprika. Cook for 20 minutes at 425.
Next, thinly slice the vegetables. For 5-7 minutes, cook the onion and pepper in a pan with olive oil, garlic powder, and onion powder. Season with salt and pepper. Put the vegetables to the side. Cook the mushrooms with olive oil and seasoning for 5-7 minutes. Add mushroom stock and cook for a couple of minutes. Season with salt and pepper. Add the onion and pepper to the pan and stir.
To assemble the sandwiches, toast the bread and spread with mayo and mustard. Top with veggies and cheese. Put them in the oven for a couple of minutes to melt the cheese.
Wednesday:
Pick up Hazel from school at 3:30 and take her home with Stella. Go home for 15 minutes and get Hazel’s instrument bag and dance shoes. Drop Hazel off at 4:30 and pick up Evelyn at school after play practice at 5. Get home at 5:30, and leave home at 6:15 to pick up Hazel by 6:30. Get home at 6:45 to feed everyone dinner.
Veggie Buffalo Chicken
A quick way that I add more kick to bland vegetarian frozen chicken strips is with a homemade buffalo sauce. Cook frozen plant-based chicken tenders according to the package. While the chicken cooks in the oven, make the buffalo sauce. Combine hot sauce, red wine vinegar, soy sauce, salt, garlic powder, and butter. When the chicken is ready, coat in buffalo sauce. Super easy.
Thursday:
Go to the eye doctor with Stella from 4 to 5. Pick up Evelyn from play practice at 5:30 and drop off Stella at school for robotics. Get home by 6. Make dinner. Leave at 7:40 to pick up Stella. Get home by 8:30. Heat up leftover dinner for Stella.
We are keeping it simple tonight: spaghetti with marinara, vegetarian meatballs, garlic bread, and salad.
Friday:
Pick up Hazel from school and take her to a music lesson by 3:45. Get Stella and Evelyn to work by 4. Pick up Hazel and get home by 4:30. Leave to take Stella to a dinner party at 6:30.
My ten-year old daughter Hazel read a graphic novel, Paws by Nathan Fairbairn. The protagonist Mindy and her mother are Korean. In the novel, Mindy prepares her favorite side dish with her mom, and she tells her readers how to make Gamja Bokkeum (fried potatoes in a sweet and salty sauce.) Hazel took photos of the pages, and she begged me to make it with her. I had never heard of Korean potatoes, but when I looked it up, I was surprised to find that this is a common side dish. We followed the graphic novel’s instructions and had a fun time learning about a new way to prepare potatoes in a sweet and salty sauce.
Gamja Bokkeum
Ingredients:
Potatoes
Garlic cloves
Onion
Soy sauce
Sesame oil
Sugar
Cooking oil
Peel and chop the potatoes. Dice the onion into large chunks. Dice the garlic. Rinse the potatoes. Heat the oil in a pan, and add the potatoes, garlic, and onion. Cook until potatoes look “see through.” Then add water, soy sauce, and sugar. Simmer about 10 minutes, stirring frequently. When the liquid evaporates, remove from heat and put in a bowl. Top with sesame oil.
While I looked up information about the potato side dish, I found another simple Korean side dish that required many of the same ingredients. I also made Sigumchi Namul, a blanched spinach coated with soy sauce, sesame oil, salt, garlic, and sugar. The vibrant green spinach was added to a simple bibimbap bowl with other vegetables and tofu with a fried egg on top.
Hazel embraced the opportunity to try something new to eat, and we had fun working together in the kitchen to prepare a meal. The smells in my kitchen were amazing. I don’t usually make Korean food, but Hazel’s recipe inspired me to make a meal that was surprisingly uncomplicated to prepare, using ingredients I already had in my kitchen.
In the whirlwind of daily life, it is a challenge to find the time to prepare meals for the family. Some days, convenience wins, and I only have time for frozen dinners. Other days, I have the time to experiment with something new in the kitchen. What I’ve come to realize is that I’ll never be the Instagram mom with the perfectly balanced and scratch-made meals every day. There’s an undeniable pressure to keep up with the seemingly perfect moms who effortlessly create picture-perfect masterpieces day in and day out. Despite the pressures of social media, I’ve accepted myself for who I am as an imperfect parent whose talents are not in the kitchen. I’ve found laughter and a close connection with my daughters, even when our meals aren’t anything extraordinary.